ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize