so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
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