shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize