its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
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Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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