Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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