How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
