he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize