new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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