I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
