Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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