No more Irish car bombs ever.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
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