Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize