their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
