You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
