All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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