mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
