my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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