I cannot find my penis.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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