No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
We got so high we made milksteak
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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