it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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