we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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