Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
