hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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