Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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