Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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