Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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