Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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