There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
