Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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