Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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