quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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