if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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