ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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