Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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