Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He? As in you personified your dick?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
