I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He has the fingertips of a God
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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