He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
