no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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