Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize