Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I intend to get homeless drunk
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
