So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
