evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
