my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
40s are totally the cure
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
