Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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