...so i touched it.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
