Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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