:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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