and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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