do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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