Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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