evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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