He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
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we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
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I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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